Ever find yourself deep in a conversation to realize, perhaps very subtly at first, and in a way that can’t be proven exactly, that you both are talking about vastly different things?

A point where, for only a moment, Theory of Mind becomes tangible and the implications of it directly applicable to you, right now.

I find myself returning to this notion, over and over. Pulled by the fascination and wonder it brings me.

It’s not clear what it is about this concept, but I must honor this feeling that makes me unable to take my eyes off of it. It is a subtlety that has brought great clarity into my everyday interactions and always serves as a foundational truth that consistently, and persistently, snaps me back to a greater reality that is happening beyond my perspective.

I use the term “Singleton Consciousness” to refer to the phenomena of what seems to be a requirement to having a single point of view as a conscious observer. One could consider other perspectives, but no matter what you do, you can’t escape the series of experiences or historic context that contaminates your every moment, thought, and glance.

It is a prison of awareness that can be your greatest ally, or your greatest enemy.

It can send you down a spiral of anxiety that seems to crystalize an identity which seems to grip on to you for an eternity. It can cloud experiences in a new light, where two individuals may have engaged in the same activity, but both were a part of completely different realities.

The overwhelming majority of our experiences in life comes with the mercy of multiple occurrences, the ability to compare, calibrate, and correct a reality that we may have previously been misled by.

If we only ever saw a single cat, from a single angle, and that was our sole experience of what a “cat” was, we would be greatly limited in our ability to generalize or appreciate other forms that this entity can take.

But, with consciousness, we are stuck with a single lens through which we view the world.

We are oblivious to what others are truly experiencing. There could be different “flavors” of consciousness, completely different perceptions of reality that come with an entirely different way that our day-to-day lives are interpreted or processed, that we are none-the-wiser to.

This leads to unnecessary disagreements, arguments, disappointments, manipulations, and blunders.

Many disagreements all come down to differing definitions of a word or idea that’s being discussed. If both had to stop and define what they’re talking about, it would be able to be picked apart and likely end up showing far more overlap in agreement than originally thought. Just like the term “God”, or “love”. When it’s brought up, we insert our own definitions for it, based on our own series of experiences… We all end up talking (or arguing) about completely different things.

…

This feels to me as an all-encompassing concept. An idea that relates to nearly everything we experience.

One way I find to leverage this to improve my life is in “exposure”, “live life for the experience”.

The more experiences you obtain in life, the richer your repertoire to pull on to make sense of the world.

You’ll have a higher resolution, a greater level of granularity, that allows you to see more than you would otherwise. And, we hear this all the time, the importance of “experience” in improving our lives or a specific domain of our life. This is why, and you can be deliberate with it. Plus, this “meta” experience, of recognizing the limitations of our awareness, can allow for compounding insights that transfer across fields. It leads to faster growth, a more all-encompassing skill-set that will pay dividends as you continually surprise yourself at just how much “everything is connected”.

Unlocking life’s secrets starts with understanding the limits of your own mind.

In the end, it’s not just about seeing the world—it’s about seeing beyond your own lens.